Review - The St. Regis Bermuda Resort

The St. Regis Bermuda Resort

November 24th, 2022

Enroute:

For this year’s Thanksgiving, we wanted to do something low key. I guess it comes naturally with age that you have less patience for the hassle as I marched into the second half of my twenties🤪. Historically we’ve gravitated towards warm climates during the Northern Hemisphere winter. So at the start of my search, I looked up Cayman Islands, Barbados and a handful other archipelagos in the West Indies we haven’t set foot on. All of those options seemed unappealing given the flights from New York weren’t all that convenient.

Unsatisfied with the South, I looked to the East and came about an interesting prospect. Well, rather the only prospect within reasonable proximity - Bermuda. Bermuda had always been on my list, but never high on that list. I think I kind of forgot it’s there, lonesome in the vast Atlantic. To my surprise, the flight time to Bermuda was under 2 hours, and there was even a direct flight on AA from JFK. The ease of reaching there simply could not be rivaled.

Booking a hotel was equally painless. There are a few good hotel options on the island, including two Fairmonts, a Rosewood and a (somewhat) newly opened St. Regis. I had some Marriott Suite Night Upgrades expiring at the end of the year, so I chose the St. Regis with the hope of confirming an upgrade.

November is the start of low season for Bermuda. Hotel rates were quite affordable, as the St. Regis was around $500/night all-in. Granted hotel pricing had largely been inflated since the pandemic.

We flew out on the morning of Thanksgiving Day. The flight, as expected, was short and smooth. After grazing over seemingly endless blankets of thick Northeast clouds, the blue waters gradually came into sight.

As soon as we landed at BDA, it was evident to me that Bermuda was going to be different than the other islands in the Caribbean we had been to. Bermuda is much more substantial. My partner told me it’s home to many insurance and reinsurance companies, which I did not previously know. While places like Turks & Caicos and St. Kitts & Nevis are stunning, hospitality isn’t particularly heartfelt, to put it mildly. And that’s completely fine. I don’t travel to have border agents put on a big smile for me, nor do I get offended when waiters expressionlessly go through motions. But it is nice to feel welcomed when you visit a destination for the first time.

The terminal itself was new and modern (and adequately air-conditioned!!). Having flown in from JFK, I thought I had landed at Changi. The immigration lady asked me what brought us to the island and wished us a good time on our holiday. Nothing over the top, just common cordiality from one human being to another. On return, there is a US Pre-clearance facility, which means your flight lands in the US as a domestic one. Did I mention very competitive duty free wine prices? All things considered, I’d give Bermuda Airport, as TikTok would say, 10 out of 10 (with chef’s kiss, of course).

Once landside, there was an orderly queue of taxis waiting outside. Bermudan taxis all go by meters, and the Bermudan dollar is pegged to USD dollar-for-dollar. In roughly 10mins we were pulling up to the porte-cochere at the St. Regis.

The exterior of the hotel was, modest? I get that we’re in Bermuda, and a structure like the Faena House might not jive too well. But bearing the St. Regis name, it shouldn’t be giving a beach condo in Gulfport, Mississippi vibes? Post the Marriott-Starwood merger, I have lingering high(er) expectations for the St. Regis brand than I do for the Ritz-Carlton. However, this particular property very much reminded me of the Ritz in Turks & Caicos, which is probably the most mediocre and excruciatingly bland hotel out there.

Check-in:

Upon arrival, there was a bellman greeting and guiding us to the reception. Through the lobby windows you could see the beautiful ocean, which I believe should be a mandatory feature for all beach resorts.

Being in the low season, the hotel was nowhere near full. It was yet a good 10 minutes before someone showed up to process our check-in. Luckily a butler was introduced to us by the bellman in the interim, so she brought over a round of (flat) cava while we waited.

Check-in was warm and efficient. Many hotel staff are Filipinos, which is a common practice in the hospitality industry. Within minutes, we had the keys to our room.

I was able to upgrade our room using Marriott Suite Night Upgrades. We had confirmed a Caroline Astor suite, which is one of the more premium suites. It is advertised as being 2,140sqft/193sqm, but I suspect it includes outdoor space as well.

First in the room was a foyer.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Foyer

Immediately to the right was a half bath.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Half Bathroom

The main part of the suite was the living room, featuring standard great room furniture, as well as a dining table for 8 to the left.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Living Room

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Dining Room

While the size of the suite was on the larger side, it was definitely sparsely furnished. Overall the room did not have much character and felt more like a renovated Marriott in Denver or Charlotte.

Outside the living room was the balcony. I found it interesting that the bedroom balcony and living room balcony weren’t connected.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Living Room Balcony

Towards the end of the dining room was the service quarter, which housed the Nespresso machine, a full-sized fridge, as well as a microwave. This also had its own entrance, so housekeeping and room service can just drop off everything here while never entering the room. There was no minibar in the room.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Service Quarter

I find it a bit odd that there were no real coffee cups in the room. It didn’t matter to us because we used the butler service to order coffee delivery, but strange nonetheless that paper cups were all there was. Passing through the living room led you to the bathroom complex, consisting of a soaking tub as the centerpiece, dual vanity, toilet, shower and closets.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Bathroom

I enjoyed the spaciousness of the bathroom, as well as the surface areas around the tub onto which you could place other items when bathing. Such as an ice bucket 😉.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Closet

Some toiletries were Le Labo, which I loved. The rest was rather inconsistent. For example, the soap was from Ren, and the lotion was from another brand I never heard of. Additionally, there were more broken pumps than functioning pumps, so we had to call and swap those out.

Outside the bathroom was the bedroom, along with its own balcony. The linens here were particularly silky and plush, so we slept extremely well every night.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Bedroom

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Bedroom Balcony

From our balconies you can look straight down onto the hotel’s two pools. A much more interesting sight - cruise ships and larger barges cutting through the channel right in front of the hotel beach.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Caroline Astor Suite Bedroom Balcony View

While it was certainly nice to have the additional square footage, I thought the suite was nothing inspirational. Much of the suite seemed like a lost opportunity to do more with.

Unwind:

November weather in Bermuda could be a pure draw of luck. On the day we arrived, it was a sunny 70°F. Two days later it became uncomfortably windy with a sustained 25mph. We lounged on the beach twice during our stay. The pool area was decent, with two pools and a hot tub inside the adult pool. The non-adult pool was (very) mildly heated. There were complimentary sunscreen and aloe vera available at the pool.

One advantage the St. Regis has over the Rosewood is that it’s directly on the beach. Meanwhile at the Rosewood you would need to take a shuttle to the beach club. The tradeoff, on the other hand, is that the St. Regis is located in the town of St. George, about an hour away from Hamilton. I thought the beach and the water were great. It got stirred up when it was windy, but otherwise remained pristine and alluring. Don’t expect Caribbean water temperature, though.

There was a respectable gym for a beach resort.

Next to the gym was a children’s club.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Children’s Club

On the super windy day we made a trip down to the spa, sitting on the same floor as the gym. The facility itself was average, but the staff were wonderful. The receptionist was a British lady named Sian. She was professional and could not be friendlier.

You can find the pricing for the treatments here. For Bermuda I thought the prices were fair.

Sian started us with a round of prosecco while giving us a facility tour. Behind the reception were the two locker rooms. Within each were a small sauna, showers and a steam shower (not steam room).

Inside the spa complex was also an outdoor hot tub. You don’t have to have a spa appointment to use it, but it was definitely lesser known than the main hot tub in the pool area. The downside was the lack of view.

The actual treatment rooms were modern and clean. They weren’t over the top like the ones you’d find in Asia with a jacuzzi big enough for the Playboy Mansion, but they were nice enough.

While I try to get a massage wherever I go, I had never been draped by a proper duvet, I think? Like they really out here putting the entire comforter on me. The massage table was technologically advanced, as it can raise the incline like a hospital bed. If it weren’t for the lemongrass pomegranate essence setting the mise-en-scène, I’d probably think I’m in an operating room.

The actual massage itself was stellar. My masseuse was Indonesian, so I was in great hands (pun fully intended). After our treatment, Sian brought over another round of sparkling to keep us hydrated.

We golfed one afternoon, as the St. Regis has the Five Forts Golf Course on property. The course sits by the water, so quite a few holes have unobstructed ocean view.

Refuel:

The dining situation at the hotel was definitely, um, quite limited. Let’s play a game called “corporate wants us to find the difference”:

So yeah, Lina turned into BLT for dinner.

The St. Regis butler service was available to us. Although I’m not sure if it’s available to all rooms or just suites. The best practical feature of the butler service was complimentary coffee and tea delivery, which we took advantage of every morning. We had a great butler named Cory. He was always friendly and polite.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Butler Coffee Service

Alternatively there’s an okay coffee/tea setup in the public areas.

The Bonvoy Elite breakfast at the St. Regis was advertised as an American breakfast, but in reality the waiters were much more lenient about making substitutions.

We mostly stuck to the American breakfast, with eggs any style, breakfast potatoes, bacon/sausage, some bread and a fruit plate. It was edible.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Lina Restaurant

On our later mornings we mixed things up a bit, which the wait staff gladly obliged. We tried the açaí yoghurt with granola, eggs benedict and caramelized apple with pancakes.

While breakfast was maybe a B, the view was definitely an A+.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort Lina Breakfast View

On our first night, we stayed in and ordered room service. I’m pretty sure they forgot the dressing for the tuna tartar because it came with just diced avocado and tuna chunks. Fortunately the tuna was incredibly fresh, so I just sprinkled some salt and pepper, and it tasted surprisingly good. The burger was on point as well.

The only other f&b venue at the hotel was the lobby bar. We popped over there one night and saw a DJ booth, so we made a U-turn as quickly as we could.

On our last night we stopped off there again before our dinner. It was actually quite a nice bar without the amplified sound system.

The cocktail menu had certain novelties to it, and our bartender was outstanding. He was attentive, conversational and knowledgeable. You can find the menu here.

After a round of apéritifs, we moved downstairs for dinner at BLT Steak.

St. Regis Bermuda Resort BLT Steak Dinner

Dinner commenced with an amuse-bouche, which was a chicken liver mousse with blueberry jam. I don’t mind a pâté but an unusual and bold choice for most, I reckon.

You can see the dinner menu here. To follow amuse-bouche was BLT Steak’s signature popover bread, which was always enjoyable. I also ordered an excellent espresso martini variation to sip on while waiting for food. I saw somebody ordering this at the bar, and the bartender was meticulous with the foam art, so I had to get one for myself.

To eat, we split a wedge salad, a dry-aged bone-in NY strip and a local snapper.

Dinner was delicious. I’ve found the BLT franchise to be extremely consistent, even in these island locations. We were absolutely full at this point, but I could never say no to a carrot cake, so we asked for one to go.

Depart:

We had a really great stay at the St. Regis Bermuda, albeit there were a few quibbles.

My main criticism was how drab and uninspiring the rooms were. I also wish there were more dining options onsite, even as someone who generally doesn’t stay somewhere for more than 4 days. For a St. Regis, I feel like it was unacceptable that no turndown service was provided. Lastly, the hallway outside our room had a terrible smell to it during our entire stay. It smelled like a chicken coup. And yes I know what a chicken coup smells like.

Besides the above, everything else was great, the staff in particular. Echoing what I mentioned in the beginning, Bermuda is the friendliest island we’ve been to. So everyone from the butlers, front desk agents to wait staff were all extremely gracious.

I’m inclined to come back to Bermuda in the summer where I imagine would have quite a scene as a NY outpost.

Review - The St. Regis Bermuda Resort

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